Friday, July 29, 2011
Am I going to die?
Well, its time for me to go home, and guess what? The critical anxious guy started circling the drain. He is in his 40's. His blood pressure plummeted. He got pale and sweaty, lethargic. Not good. I had been worried about him anyway and I don't worry about a lot of people, but he worried me. I just had this feeling that he could go down the toilet at any minute and sure enough he did. So he went into trendelenburg, fluids wide open, blood already infusing. Doctor sets up to put in a central line. We get the rapid infuser ready to plug into that line. This guy, who had been so anxious that he was literally shaking, was now staring, still conscious but very quiet. When I gave report to the ICU nurse, the first thing I said was this guy worries me. I don't say that much. Will he make it? I don't know. He will need some rapid intervention in ICU or he won't.
As I left he was still in trendelenburg, looking a little better but not much. When I got home I cried. I never cry. I have been doing this so long that I have seen just about everything, done just about everything. I saw his face, pale and sweaty, as I rode home staring off into space. His worse nightmare was coming true. He was only one of several younger critical patients I've had in the last couple of months. I guess it just got to me today. After all, I'm human.
Posted by girlvet at 1:56 PM