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Sunday, April 08, 2012

ten, count 'em ten, weird moments in the ER

In my 59 years in the emergency here are a ten weird things that have happened:

1) A man comes up to the triage window and says his car broke down a couple of blocks away and can we borrow him some money. He promises to pay us back.

2) My 250 pound patient becomes so agitated he stands up on the ER cart, swinging his arms around and almost goes over the side.

3) I am triaging a woman and when I ask her when her last period was, she says, "I'm not a woman". Fooled me.

4) A kitten is found wandering down the hall in the ER. My coworker takes it home and adopts it.

5) A man ties up his dog outside the ER and comes in to be seen.

6) My husband is sitting outside the ER entrance waiting for me to come out. A car pulls up in front of him. Suddenly 3 or 4 cars appear and people jump out with guns and rifles, pointing them at the car. A cop yells to my husband to "get down!". It turns out that the guy in the car was wanted for murder and the cops had been trailing him.

7) A man comes in with a cat bite. He and a friend had been driving on the highway and heard a strange sound coming from the front of the car. They found a kitten curled up under the hood apparently trying to stay warm on a cold day. When they went to get the kitten out, it bit him. Rabies shots.

8) A man is on a flight from an Asian country to Canada. He becomes so drunk that they can't arouse him. They divert to our city and he is brought to ER. He doesn't speak any english of course.

9) A man comes up to the ER desk and says that he is God. He says it took him a long time to figure this out. Does he want to be seen? No he just wants to know the way to McDonalds.

10) A man in his sixties comes in and for some reason that I can't recall, we take his shoes off. Lo and behold there is a baggie of crack which we confiscate and give to security. They flush it down the toilet. At the end of the visit, the man becomes irate because he wants his crack back...

And the beat goes on...

11 comments:

jimbo26 said...

With the utmost respect , you are older than I thought . ��

Adam Ghilchritst said...
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Stephanie said...

I am just wondering if i could ask you a few questions? I am interested in going back to school for nursing and i would love some insight! Thank you! My email is stong08@gmail.com

Nurse and Hospital Stories said...

haha. Love the scenario of the cop and your husband outside the hospital. Quite like an action film, eh. Bizarre thing to happen. :)

Cheers,
Peny@cherokee scrubs

ThorMD said...

I recently saw a 73 year old lady who had just had a breast augmentation. My mind is still having trouble comprehending this (and no she doesn't have breast CA and hadn't just had a mastectomy). She just wanted bigger boobs and decided to go for it.

Term papers said...
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hoodnurse said...

9.Okay, so did you check him in involuntarily for a psych eval or just direct him to the McDonalds and pretend it never happened?

girlvet said...

of course we pretended it didn't happen

hoodnurse said...

Exactly how I would have handled it. STRONG WORK.

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Andrewzgqn said...

Exactly how I would have handled it. STRONG WORK.