Wednesday, February 16, 2011

machine gun kelly and choclate chip cookies



ER docs come in many different varieties. Some of them could sell ice to an eskimo. Some of them pull up a chair to "talk". THen there is the machine gun kellys.

It is obvious that when ER docs train they learn to rule out the worst first (hey that rhymes) They want to know right off the bat whether you got something that could kill ya. Once they determine you ain't gonna die in the next five minutes they can relax and go to the doctors lounge for some cookies (har). Apparently they have to memorize a series of questions about stuff like chest pain, breathing, black or blood stools, headaches, unusual rashes, etc etc etc. I have heard the litany of questions too many times to count.

THe interesting part is how these questions are presented. Sometimes they are presented so fast that they can make the patients headspin:"doyouhaveanychestpainshortnessofbreathblackorbloodystoolsunusualheadachesrashesetcetcetc". Some doctors don't even have to take a breath during this recitation. The patient is left saying: "huh? what?" at the end. One doctor in our ER is like a machine gun. Its really kind of comical. Hey Dr Machine Gun I like chocolate chip cookies.

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