it's like being slowly tortured

Its like torture sitting in an ICU at the bedside of a loved one. They have tubes coming out of everywhere. You know they are uncomfortable. They are scared and the thing is there is nothing you can really do about it. You want to fix it. You can't.

So you sit there every day hanging on every word of the doctor who comes around a couple of times a day. What's todays verdict: better, the same, worse? Most days its the same. Progress in critical illness can be agonizingly slow. You begin to wonder when it will all end. It's too much. It's too stressful. You don't think you can come here another day. But you do, you will be ere tomorrow.

One thing I noticed is the kindness of those who cared for her. From the resident to the nurses to the RT person to the housekeeper who asked if she was better. I could tell they all cared. That made such a difference. You soak it up like a sponge knowing that these people are doing their very best for her. Doctors are really important, they are the directors of care and use their knowledge to make people better, but it is the everyday care that the family sees - the nurses, the RTs. They are the one who spend time with the patient and the family 24/7. They are the ones who carry out the care and notice the differences every day.

She's transferring to the floor today. Yeah!