nursing thy name is Madness

Dear Madness the nurse:

I am a second year nursing student and I look to you as a role model. To me, you are the epitome of what a nurse is. Thank you for being an inspiration.

Sincerely

A Secret Admirer

Dear S. Admirer:

Oh, I do declare, you make blush..I do leave the other nurses in the dust don't I? A familiar scene in my ER: Me doing CPR with one hand, pushes meds with the other, on the phone to lab, shouting orders to the lesser minions, all while dancing a jig.

***

Dear Madness the nurse:

Nurses uniforms have changed so much over the years. They have gone from looking like a nun to scrubs with cartoon characters. In your opinion, what is the proper uniform for a nurse?

Sincerely,

Just Curious

Dear J. Curious:

I have been wanting to speak about this subject for a long time. The only proper uniform for a nurse is a polyester dress with a zipper up the front. Its all that I will wear. Of course, I wear a starched cap, white hose and white "nursing shoes". I of course, carry a fanny pack. I think nurses who carry fanny packs look so professional. Here is what I have in it:

kelly clamp
scissors
tape
alcohol wipes
emesis basin
urinal
bed pan
gloves
IV catheters
dressings
nasal cannula
neb kit
IV bag
IV tubing
motrin
eye drops
breath mints
snickers bar
diet pepsi
kleenex
pens
toothbrush and toothpaste
cell phone

I know thats a lot of stuff...its a very large fanny pack, more like a back pack...quite unweildly at times...it has saved many a life.