killing two birds with one stone

You are out in the suburbs visiting a friend.  Can't get a ride home.  You also have a hankering for some dope.

What to do? What to do?

You do what  you have been doing for some time now wander down to one of the main streets. You limp into a local business and ask them to call an ambulance.

The ambulance arrives. You tell them you twisted your ankle. u You put on a good show, barely able to walk, lots of groans and facial grimaces.  When you get inside the ambulance and the pain is much, much worse. Of course, the paramedic, wanting to do her job, starts an IV and gives you a narcotic pain med. Ah....much better.

You tell the paramedic you want to go to X hospital, that one being nearest to your house.  This is quite a distance into the inner city.  Takes that ambulance off the road for a while.  Hey that's not your problem right?

You arrive at the hospital, a place that has become familiar with you and your various ailments. You know they won't give you more narcs. The minute the nurse leaves the room, you get up and walk out.

You have achieved your goal: 1) a ride home
                                              2) narcotics