***PUBIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT***Attention all citizens:
The following are not emergencies:
1) bug bites - unless it have swollen to the size of a baseball
2) the fact that you cannot control your teenage daughter or son
3) you are fatigued or can't sleep
4) you want your son, daughter, brother, sister, etc. to get chemical dependency treatment
5) the condom broke
6) you are hungover
7) G tube not working
8) the cut is less than 1"
9) any kind of medication refill
10) menstrual cramps
That is all...go about your business.
are you serious? Wow.
ReplyDelete11) Chapped lips
ReplyDelete12) Athlete's foot
13) Skinned knees
14) Toothaches without facial
swelling
15) Acne
how a about any ache/pain that has been going on for years or months?
ReplyDelete16) mild sunburn
ReplyDelete17) kid with a runny nose
And yea, I friggin hate the G-tube stuff too. We get those at least a couple times a week (clogged, malfunctioning, etc), and it always pisses everyone off.
18) Pregnancy tests
ReplyDelete19) Burning with urination - drink some cranberry juice & a lot of water!
20) Any discharge below the belt, whether male or female.
21) Any chronic complaint.
Had a guy come in for a bruise on his tailbone. Had to take a picture of it with my phone and show it to him before he would believe it wasn't an abscess!
ReplyDeleteI just started ROFLing when I saw the title - PUBIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT
ReplyDeleteYou forgot an L there.
22. A rash that was there, and is now gone
ReplyDelete24. I want you to take out my IUD
25. I want the morning after pill and I can't afford to buy it over the counter (but I have an iPhone and smoke two packs a day)
26. I ran out of tylenol for my baby and I want a prescription so the "state" can pay for it.
#24while my 2prepubescent boys watch (what is wrong with u get a baby sitter)
DeleteDrink cranberry juice for a UTI? Really? I have had frequent UTI's since I was a small child. I know to avoid scented toiletries and to urinate after sex. Despite all the precautions I take I still get UTI's several times a year. I usually go to my PCP for treatment. Twice in the last year I have been out of town and the town didn't have an urgent treatment clinic so I had to go to the E.R. since I was in so much discomfort and NO I never ask or take narcotics. I just want antibiotics. How is this a crime?
ReplyDelete