Monday, July 04, 2011

mr. crackheads lucky day

This is the kind of completely ridiculous shit that goes on in an ER:

Crackhead/alcoholic man presents saying that he was assaulted. Moaning and groaning and writhing and carrying on as crackheads/alcoholics are want to do. Out partying with the cocaine and jack daniels and, lo and behold, one of his companions became "peeved" and threw said crackheadee to the ground, prompting a visit to the ER.

ER doc orders ativan and toradol PRONTO! You betcha, ifitdle shut this upstanding citizen up, I'm down. Course it doesn't. Urine tox comes back positive for guess what: COCAINENA Morphine and benadryl (crackhead be itchin') PRONTO! exclaims ER doc...Okay let me get this straight - we got us some crack, alcohol, toradol, ativan and now benadryl and morphine...Oh did I mention that Mr. Crackhead went home with a Vicodin script? Why the hell not? Lets add another 15 Vicodin to the mix!

Well at least mr. crackheads humiliated family who took him home won't have to deal with him for the next few hours as he sleeps off all of this shit.

Exit stage right: Rocket scientist ER doc


Jess said...

Xanax and Methadone would have been a good addition. Good stuff and guaranteed to keep them coming back for more "help".

I get a warm and fuzzy feeling knowing I'll work a few extra minutes today to guarantee top notch health care for this citizen of the year.

ERP said...

Wtf? You and nurse K seem to have the worst ER docs on the planet.

newnurseinthehood said...

That's pretty half assed. He needs to go all the way and prescribe some MJ juice.

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