the year I got a vibrator for nurse week

I kid you not.  One year the hospital got us all vibrators for nurse
week. No doubt the thought was we could massage our old tired muscles but really: A VIBRATOR???!! What were they thinking?
I have to say the jokes out of that gift went on for a long time...

Every year Advanced Healthcare Shop gives a gift certificate for the worst nurse week gift. Here are some selections from entries this year:

From ANN, RN, Florida: Having been an RN for 38 years and working in five different states, I have received varied "gifts" over the years. The usual pens, pins, mugs, tote bags, lunch bags and sweets have all been received. Having thought I had seen it all by now, I was stunned when our clinic administration gave us a bar of soap for Nurses' Week! We opened our "gift bags", our jaws dropped and we looked at each other wide-eyed and said simultaneously, "A bar of soap?!?!" Laughter erupted when one of the nurses said "Look! It's cellulite soap!" Sure enough, peering closely at the label it was a bar of soap touting its ability to treat cellulite. We all laughed and said "Well, that does it, we get chocolate next year!" Periodically, months later someone would say, "You know I used that soap and look, it didn't do a thing!" We were hoping the message wasn't what it seemed, but in true Nursing fashion, we saw the humor in it and moved on, doing our jobs and doing them well!

From GINGER RN, PHN, New Jersey: Nurses at a small Philly hospital were given a special gift from one of the TOP surgeons. He told everyone this was his tribute to the BEST nurses he'd ever worked with... It was a 3 X 5 color photo of his great dane dog, "Lilly White", with a nurses cap on her head. Really!

From CAROLINE, RN, North Carolina: The worst nurses week gift I got was when I was on the GI unit at a hospital. I received an enema bottle filled with brown M&M's. It was very distasteful to say the least. We kept trying to figure out where the bottles came from. Yuck!!

From ALESSANDRA, RN, Texas: Now I don't want to sound unappreciative, but sometimes a Thank You is best. Nurses week is usually a big deal in our hospital system. In the past we have gotten nice T-shirts, insulated lunch boxes, insulated coffee cups, etc. Last year, they must have been hurting financially. We received these very thin, very ugly beach towels. They didn't have any hospital logo on them, no nursing phrase, no healthcare ditty, nothing. As a matter of fact, it had a winter scene on the front. We are in South Texas, in May it’s very hot - clearly summer. Although appreciated, I graciously gave mine to another employee and as I did so, the fibers of the towel began to pull. Some of the threads came loose and started coming undone! A very poor attempt at being cheap.

From PATRICIA, RN, New York: The absolute worst gift I ever received was an old fashioned, white, chipped porcelain bedpan that was filled with dirt and was planted with numerous flowering live cacti.

What was your worse nurse week gift?