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Wednesday, June 04, 2014

naughty things ER nurses do

I put a picture on here of the " most interesting man in the world" with the words: I don't always give kayexalate but when I do its right after I call report to the floor.

I thought you might like to know some other naughty things ER nurses do

1) aforementioned Kayexalate. Ditto: lactulose.

2) Give lasix to that little old lady who is too weak to get up and has to get on the bed pan.  Oh...my...when did that lasix order appear?  Oh, let me give it before transport comes...

3) Wait until the detox van/ambulance to tell the patient they are going to detox.

4) Wait until the mental health staff is on their way down to tell that unhappy patient they are being placed on a 72 hour hold.

5) Try to talk the doctor into a barium enema for that fecal impaction.

6) Tell that annoying family member who has called twenty times that there is no point coming to the emergency because the patient will be going up soon. Give them the station number.

7) Try to get the doctor to order an inpatient bed for that mean patient as soon as possible.

8) Fudge the breathylyzer results for detox requirement of <.3

9) Say we don't know how long the wait will be.

10) Say the doctor will be in "shortly".  Say the bed will be ready "shortly".

Yes we can be evil.

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