Translate

Saturday, October 29, 2016

Unwritten rules of the ER

1) If you come in on a backboard you will have to go to the bathroom within minutes of arrival.
2) If you come in with a probable broken hip you will have to to the bathroom immediately on arrival.
3) If you order food you will be too busy to eat it.
4) Xrays that were done in a nursing home of that broken hip will never come with the patient to the hospital. They will have to be done again.
5) If your patient overdosed on pills and you have to do a gastric lavage, they will always have eaten a disgusting meal before they took the pills.
6) If you get a loud, obnoxious drunk, detox will be full.
7) If one person comes up to the triage window to ask how much longer it will be, it will have a domino effect and everybody in the waiting room will come up there too.
8) If your pro football team is any good at all, you will slow down during the games.
9) If you wear any kind of new uniform or shoes someone will bleed, vomit or pee on them.
10) If you are the charge nurse and go to the bathroom, your phone will ring.
11) If you are having a horrible, busy day, at least one of your frequent flyers will show up. (Its like they have radar or something)
12) If you have a patient who is crashing, ICU tell you they have to transfer a patient to take yours.
13) Its true that when the moon is full, or there is a change in barometric pressure, the weirdos come out of the woodwork.
14) At some point in your time in ER, an embarrassing relative, old boyfriend, hated friend will come in while you're working.
15) When you are really, really busy, one of the following things will happen: the computer will go down, the tube system will go down, a lab machine will go down,
the hospital down the street will go on divert.

7 comments:

Shelterd Life said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Erica Atkinson said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Just found this blog! I love it, lol ... I will be coming back to read more! -T

Anonymous said...

I am a Hospice nurse. I love reading the ED blog!! It is so very different from my practice!! We have MUCH to learn from one another!! ED nurses are fantastic!!!!

Anonymous said...

Erika,
I am so very sad for your loss. As nurses, we try our best to help our patients. Your experience was tragic. I hope that you can realize that human error is inevitable. Your loss will be felt among your caregivers for a long time to come. Please forgive them so that you can be at ease with your life and endeavors. I wish you the best!

alfallah12345 said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Fuck you said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.