Wednesday, June 29, 2011

family members from hell

In my never ending quest to entertain y'all, I offer the following categories of various FAMILY MEMBERS FROM HELL:

DOORWAY GAWKER- stands in room doorway and stares at the staff, arms folded, from the doorway with an impatient, angry look on their face
THE VENTRILOQUIST - talks for the patient until you tell them to stop it
THE SHADOW- you have to pry this person away from the patients bedside in order to do your job. then they watch every move you make as you start an IV, give meds, etc.
APATHETIC ANN/ANDY - brings a book, laptop - has a sort of been here/done this attitude - seems uninterested in whats going on
THE SUCKER - accompanies a patient with some kind of bogus chronic problem and has bought into it hook, line and sinker
THE KLEPTOMANIAC - you might catch this person rummaging through the cupboards, drawers and perhaps pocketing a thing or twoTHE ERRAND RUNNER - may come up to the desk requesting warm blankets, footies, water, food, more pain meds, etc etc etc
MAMAS BOY MAMA - accompanies their grown son or daughter to the ER and sits with concerned look at bedside
BABY DADDY - accompanies girlfriend to ER and is suspicious of any male that comes into the room. Wants to stay there when pelvic exam is being done.
THE DUMPER- drops off confused mom/dad/annoying sibling/girlfriend/boyfriend and leaves
SPACE INVADERS - crosses that line into the staff area or follows the doctor into their area - definitely a no no
CHRISTMAS GIFTERS - brings mom/dad/grandma who they haven't seen for months to ER because they "aren't doing that well/can't take care of themselves/need to go to a nursing home"
CHICKEN LITTLE - runs to triage desk requesting help for mom/dad/etc in the car who are dying (99% of the time they are fine). Comes up to the desk and tells you heart monitor is dinging - is that OK??!!!
SUSPICIOUS STAN/STELLA- takes notes - wants names of staff, name of medication, name of tests. Has special "medical notebook".
I know, I know I'm evil. Oh well....that's already been established....


Frank the Angry Lobster said...

I can understand how a lot of that can be annoying. I'm sure I'll be annoyed with it, as well, once I finish my nursing program. Still, I can't deny that I'd still be "The Shadow" when it came to my girlfriend. I love her too much to leave her alone, hehe.

Anonymous said...

I'd be half of those that you can't stand. And I don't care. So many medical mistakes are made, it's an excellent idea to have a family member watching over you.
Besides - you don't like the ones who are indifferent, and don't care and aren't paying attention. And then, you don't like the ones who are observant and paying attention. Pretty much can't win there.
Invading space etc - no, that's just plain rude and ignorant, I'd never do that.

Anonymous said...

Can you identify a type that would be good? It's hard to know what to do, when you are in an ER with a loved one, particularly a loved one with severe allergies.

texophilia said...

You forgot about the freaky people accompanying patients that tell you, "I'm a nurse." when you know perfectly well any nurse in an ER would never admit it.