Saturday, June 04, 2011

questions that deserve answers

Questions asked of the ER staff:

1) By phone: do you do c-sections in the ER? I'm tired of carrying this baby... (I hear ya sista)
2) To triage staff: can you borrow me $20? My car broke down a couple of blocks from here - I promise I'll bring it back...(sure...let me go get my purse)
3) Can you give me a ride to my car that I left in the parking lot about a mile from here? (no problem let me go get the ER van..)
4) On the way out: Have you got any condoms? (oh how I wish we did)
5) by phone: is doctor so and so working tonight? (he was fired yesterday..)
6) How many milligrams of Dilaudid or Morphine did you give me? (98)
7) Can I see: Jane, John, Mary, Sue? No I don't know their last name. I just met them an hour ago. (Isn't it nice how you make friends so easily...)
8) Do I have time to go to McDonalds before you call me? (of course, hey will you get me a blizzard while your there?)
9) Can I have a warm blanket, food, footies, a cab voucher, a bus token, a soda, some coffee? (you can have all that and more...let me get the ER conciere)
10) What's that smell? (ha....haha....hahahahaha...)


newnurseinthehood said...

We really should invest in an ER van. It would solve so many problems.

rnraquel said...

The ER concierge...I'll bet that is next in the patient pleasing patient satisfaction campaign! He/she can fetch warm blankets, soda, coffee, bus vouchers, make dinner reservations...who knows?